Holiday Foods to Get You in the Mood
The most overused euphemism during the holidays is when someone talks about stuffing someone’s bird. While you may always get a giggle with your same joke every year, there are some far more exciting ways to switch up the banter and use holiday foods to your advantage this holiday season.
If you want to go with a silent approach that is sure to get someone in the mood, there are plenty of aphrodisiac foods ono the Thanksgiving table! That asparagus side dish that grandma is chowing down on will likely have her knocking on grandpa’s door later! Normal seasonings, such as olive oil, ginger, cinnamon, garlic, and basil may seem like innocent contenders to make dinner dishes pop, but they’ll also have you “pop” in your pants if you enjoy too much! If you decide to steer clear and think that desserts are a better bet, pumpkin or chocolate will also have you begging for the horizontal tango from your partner tonight!
Are you more of the Thanksgiving flirt with a dirty mind? Offer to help baste their turkey nice and slow so you can make sure you get as much flavor as possible. If you want to keep everything nice and moist, make sure you tie those legs nice and tight! The turkey legs, of course. Want to be a little more brazen with the flirting? Make sure you mention that the food on the table is only your first feast of the night. The next feast is the one you’ll be eating in the bedroom later.
Do you want to take the erotic food ideas to the chatlines with you? Let’s talk about using foods for fantasy. Cranberry sauce can be extremely erotic when poured down the chest and licked off, as long as you go for the fresh made – stay away from the canned jelly abomination. Apple or pumpkin pie can always be fed to each other slowly and seductively, and the sweet taste is enough to turn anyone on. A little whipped cream may even accidentally drop off the fork, and you can’t let it go to waste by leaving it there on their nipples. If all else fails, the moment you mention putting any phallic-shaped object in your mouth, like carrots or green beans, or licking the juice off your fingers, your partner’s mind will immediately go to the oral implications and have them begging you to butter their biscuit in no time.
When you can’t handle the pent-up need for release, let them swallow your gravy or frost your cake. Make sure that you are one of the things they have to be thankful for, this year, even if they can’t mention why at the family dinner table! Thanksgiving just became the hottest meal of the year, and our chatlines are dripping with sauce as they wait to get their pumpkins spiced tonight.